Cool Kids Association Of Nigeria.

Okay i know your first reaction is probably wth?! But your allowed to think like that. It was my exact same reaction when i first of all heard the phrase.

Cool kid yeah? Quite hilarious! Hehehe..

So a couple of days ago, i was chilling with a couple of friends and we were talking about how everybody has a blog nowadays and somebody said, "Oh! Dont you know its one of the requirements to be a cool kid?" and i'm like O.O

Apparently the other requirements are (according to my friend that is) :
.. Own a set of Beats by Dre headphones.
.. Have atleast two different colours of contacts
.. Have a blog
..You must know how to edit pictures..master the art of photoshopping!

P.s. I have all of these according to her except the Beats..Nokia or Ipod earphone chilling  :( And my birthday is in about 32 days so show some love na..haha..jk..

Also i know everybody has their own rule book for the cool kids i guess. Earlier in the week, a number of people were even tweeting about CKAN..Cool Kids association of Nigeria if you are lost.

And the thing is, a lot of people live their lives trying to be cool kids and seriously they have me shaking my head vigourously. It fun to be a cool kid o like me..hehehe..buit really you dont have to go out of your way to take a picture with your friend's Beats or something na.

Cool Kids rock yeah..and for the fun of it, i'm going to make my own Cool Kids requirement list too.

Here we go:
..Have over 500 followers on twitter (It is an achievement trust me, so clap for yourself)
..You must have atleast a pair of coloured skinnies.
..You must always form bad guy even if its not necessary.
..Nobody rolls with Ipods anymore so you must have Ipad.

Okay i'm all out of ideas seeing as i suck ar being a cool kid, but rock as being me..I think you should do same! :)

P.s.s. beats are Headphones for listening to music and all, not Neck accessories!!!! Choi! #okbye

xxx..

Dear Future Husband

I've always wanted to just sit and write a letter to my future husband (aka BankyW..lol...JK) so thats what ima do this night. Future husby i really hope you are reading this by some odd chance so we can always sit back in the next 20 years and laugh about it.

P.s. This is very vital privileged information though and it is all inspired by the love i have for you. Hehehe. Legooo

1. You must be tall o! As in very tall so you could always lift me and my legs will really be dangling in the air. Infact ehn, i want my head to be reaching just your upperarm not shoulder. So if you are short now you can like to start body stretching exercises. Or simply just go on an exclusive beans diet. :D Remember its because i love you o!

2. You know you are a very lucky man seeing as i'm a 'one-naira' chic. Yes o! I said one naira. But err husby, you know you love me na so don't let me remain a one-naira chic forever. Feel free to add as many zeros to the one..you know..;)

3. I like cooking very much (or rather experimenting) so please sweetheart get ready. No more regular rice and beans and bread. I'm talking beef stronganoff, balsamic rice, fillet mignons...you will enjoy o! But if i get it wrong the first time i cook it, just smile and force yourself to finish it. Or 'codedly' pour it under the table.

4. Husby, if you think i'll ever hire an 'Ekaette' better come back from jonzing world now now. We'll have maybe an 'Abeni' 'Mary-rose' or 'Blessing' if you are lucky gan. (No offence to anybody bearing any of those names)

5. And please Husby you know i'm a senseless romantic so you have to tell me i'm the most beautiful woman ever every single day, even when i'm pregnant, bloated and waddling about like a Duck, just because you love me..:D

6. You know we have to keep the romance in our marriage alive so every last Friday of every other month is our night. You must take me out to dinner and treat me like your little princess. And please we dont do fast-food only continental restaurants and the likes (I am still a one-naira chic o! I just like good things. I mean, who doesn't!)

7. Please husby, i'm begging now, you must be able to sing me out of my senses. No TerryG or Timaya business o! I need you to serenade me like Neyo, or Banky or Bez or John Legend or even 2face (at worst). And please if you have no writing skill endeavour not to form you own lyrics because i will laugh if you sing nonsense. You can always sing me a Lionel Richie classic.
*Big hint: Perform for me at our wedding, i promise to act surprised and even throw it a few tears. <3

Pause.

Husby hope it not too much already? Oya i'll soon finish.

8. This is a very vital part. So listen well! I want 8 kids. Yes! 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 kids! Please please please please please. So if you have no plans of being 'rich' oya please start changing your mind. The 8 is somehow negotiable sha..but please, you know you love me so 8. And i have no problem popping them out. :D

9. This is the last one hun. God first baby! Go and learn all you bible stories now so you can read them to our children at night. Remember it was David that killed Goliath o! And moses that parted the Red sea (better don't change the colour). Before you teach our children nonsense. Lol..

And that is it..okay there might be part 2 o. Hehehe.. Just have it at the back of your mind that i'm ready to love you with every single atom of my being hun. Ima be yours and yours only forever and ever. :* <3

xoxo

Midnight. (A Nigerian Adaptation Of Twilight)

I was ninety nine point nine percent sure i was dreaming. Nobody ever looked like this! He was perfection personified.

John Clement.

Even his name had a ring to it. I knew what he really was. I knew his type. I should have figured it right from the beginning. His golden honey brown eyes and very black skin. He could easily be mistaken for a fully sun-baked Ghanaian but i knew better.

His type, they loved the heat (even when there were temperature extremities). That was why they had freshly moved to Lagos. The blazing, scorching sun was bound to attract his type but the Clements were the first of their kind in Lagos.

I did not know why, but i felt a strong unexplainable attraction to John, ever since his blazing skin mistakenly touched mine in biology practical class when i was trying very hard not to touch the formaline-infested frog.

I remembered what i had read the previous night about their type when curiousity had gotten the better of me. Known to have descended from the same bloodline as Clifford Orji, there were known as the hot ones. It was said that midnight wast the best time to hunt. The best time for them to hunt.

John's image popped into my mind again. Perfect jet black skin, golden honey brown eyes. he always had that strength, that agility that just made you imagine him pounding yam! Yes! John Clement at his full height og 6 ft 5" was a perfect picture of the perfect African man.

The only exception was that i knew just what he was. A WINCHARD. He was from a full family of winchies and winchard. And a very hot..sorry i mean pretty..no beautiful black bodied family family at that. I had made up my mind to confront him that day but just as i crossed the field to where he was standing with the other Clements I heard someone call my name,

'Ekanma!'

Before the real love story..

One sunny afternoon..

After a very stressful and long lecture..PHS101 to be specific, i walked to see my friend at her own class. From there we were supposed to go have lunch together.

We had the usual 'what happened all morning' talk while walking to the food place and then..*insert drumroll here* i sighted a certain hot boy. You know the kind you and your friends just stop and stare discreetly at..yeah that kind of hot. Then the daydreaming began and lasted all through lunch..those fabulous eyes gazing into mine, having lunch and finishing eachother's sentences, watching movies together..i had really lost it!

Finally i woke up after getting pepper in the wrong place. Nothing like a bout of cough and watering eyes to bring me back to earth! Drat it! It still did not end there. I talked my friends ears off and then they started getting annoyed after my ranting all through lunch (P.S. I have the most fabulous friends in the world).

I did stop my day dreaming after lunch. I returned to the immense heat of the afternoon and another round of annoying classes and that did the trick. I forgot all about my hottie.

But little did i know that that wasn't the end of my story...it was just the beginning of my love story..

xxx